My time in prison...

The majority of my time this weekend was spent in prison...

Together with about 65 other people, I trekked into the Clement's prison unit in Amarillo.  Our goal there was to bless with the love of Christ and to pass out a small gift:  a paper sack filled with an apple, an orange, a bar of soap, a bottle of shampoo, and a handful of peppermints.  How would you like to receive that for Christmas?  Believe me...it was worth gold...

You can't do something like that and not expect to be affected in some way.  I was...in every way.

Prison is nothing like what you see on the movies...it's grey, drab, and dreary.  It smells, the food is horrendous, you have nothing to do, and there's absolutely no privacy (unless you're in one of the super high security areas, and believe me, you don't want to be there...)  Even worse, you are slammed in the face every single second with the fact that you are bad, evil...no more than an "offender," less than a human being.  It's humiliating, degrading...and you can't escape it.  I cannot tell you how many men I watched try to wipe off their hand before they would shake mine...as if they had some vile disease of humanity that wasn't worthy of touch...I'm not saying that wrongs shouldn't be punished...and I know that some men there were guilty of some horrific wrongs...but beyond that, I was reminded of the fact that God never does that with me.  His grace and His love cover my sins with the weight of His glory...His sacrifice redeems me, and sanctifies me.  He promises to transform me...renew me...to make an image-bearer of His glory.  Oh God, thank you for Your grace!

Beyond that, my eyes were opened, and my heart humbled, so incredibly much.  As briefly as possible, I would love to share...

The humility of these men was astounding.  Never once did I hear any of the ones that I spent time with complain or gripe.  They held no bitterness about their situation or the bad treatment some of them got.  They humbly accepted it as their punishment, and bore it with grace.  God forgive me...how quick am I to gripe and complain the instant something doesn't go my way...expecting that I actually deserve that??

Beyond their humility, I was so blessed and challenged by the way they chose to completely GLORY in the Lord and fully rest in His sovreignty.  Over and over, they praised Him as good, as great, faithful and true.  So many of them had no doubt that He was in control (even when they were rejected for parole ten times...) and they loved Him regardless of their circumstances--simply because of who He is!

Oh Lord, what a challenge to me!  Teach me what it means to live with the same fervor and passion, to deeply rest in You as aboslutely sovreign, and to praise You in all things...

God, you are good...be with my brothers tonight.  May they know Your grace, peace, and love, even as they live in a place that is anything but...